Today I feel sad.

I have realised that another fling is over with. I am not really sad about the fact that I am not seeing the Brussels guy any more. I am sad that another situation didn't work out. I am also a little sad that he has updated his Facebook status to 'It's complicated' but that's selfish so I'm glad that he's moving on.

I wasn't very nice to him last time he came to stay and really just used him for sex and intimacy and then felt shit about it but unable to actually say, 'We need to stop seeing each other completely.' How do you say that you don't even want to be friends?

I'm going to sound like a real pig now, but I am going to miss the chance of having someone to stay with in Brussels. I liked the idea of having a contact there who I could jet over and see.

Now it's all changed. I would feel weird going and not having sex. I don't think we could be just friends.

I find him irritating.

This is the right thing to do but I feel sad not about leaving him, if you can call it that, just ending it. :(